Fat Cat in a Small Drawer/Dairy Delivery/Surprise Summer Packages Ready to Mail/+1 for Allegra/The Blockade Runner Hotel, a very chic work meeting destination/Glorified (chicken!) Tortilla Soup/Cute Cat Snoozing, Baby Shower Storage Space
Not to be outdone by her brother, Allegra decided to bring a furry prize inside today to show off for Luke. Only instead of demonstrating her agility she let it go just in time for Luke to watch it slowly mosey under our sofa (which, by the way, is too close to the ground for our cats to get under) and then proceeded to plop down with satisfaction. This time, Luke got the privileged role of freaking out as we problem-solved how to get it out from under the couch and back into the yard. Turns out this field mouse was not just the biggest, furriest mouse either of us had ever seen, it was also retarded. Seriously. It was living proof that Darwin is outdated and survival of the fittest is a crock of shit. It just bounced, slowly, with no concern for flight or speed whatsoever. We had to literally toss it out of the house with the broom. And even then, it just sat there by our front door until we pushed it along to the edge of the driveway into the grass.
I guess this is spring?
Yesterday was eventful.
What was supposed to be a relaxing day off from work – – piddling time away on the computer, reading, doing a little running – – was hijacked by my furry-purry-fat-lover-of-a-cat who evidently has a certain je ne sais pas with regards to garden prowess.
So there I am, hanging out upstairs, barefoot, mentally gearing up for a workout when my cat joins me. I don’t think much of it at first but before long he makes a declarative meow to command my attention. It is with a lazy, lingering sense of calm that I slowly acknowledge the very real presence of a very real snake right.there.on.the.floor.
Proceed to freakout. Manic texts to Luke. And a lot of *fucks* flying out of my mouth in between shrill terror-filled screams that do little besides elicit concern and confusion from my furry predator of a sidekick.
After way too much time had passed, my heart beating at capacity, I managed to contain the situation.
And with no time at all was OUT of the house for the rest of the evening, killing time before Luke was available for dinner, and could then proceed to deal with our situation. I’ll admit, I felt real adult in deciding to let the snake live. But not before stipulating that it needed to be released no less than 2 miles from our home.
Luke’s basically the greatest husband ever.
Not only did he capture the beast, he drove it out of our neighborhood and released it into the wild. He’s a keeper.
Luke finally took the plunge and got tested for allergies. After years of just knowing, in his gut, with all his instincts and intuition, that he was allergic to cats and dust it turns out…
he’s hardly allergic to anything! Just some obscure soil mold… and some other ultra obscure mold. Ha!
I guess this means nothing is left to hold us back from adopting more kittens. ;)
Lots. More. Kittens.