dramatic macaroni and cheese

Yeah, so, today was crappy.

Woken up at dawn

from my best night of sleep in as long as I can remember

(despite the fact that I wasn’t into bed until after 2 am)

because the third-in at the shop was delayed indefinitely.

Long morning followed by an even longer “productivity session”

 – payroll, scheduling, labor analysis, food analysis, store reports, weekly recaps, email, store orders… –

punctuated by a 24 hour resignation notice via text message.

(Which is a lot like being broken up with on a post-it.)


More scheduling, this time more like frantic shifting/tweaking/begging/pleading/texting/calling

plus a couple of tears, not because I’m sad so much as I’m just tired.

Tired of peoples’ shit.

It was one one of those days though

that went well beyond the realm of the human.

If it could go wrong, it did.

Both blenders broke.

Ran out of the most popular syrup.

Keyboard mysteriously missing two keys.

A store starting the day with 9 people –

now with 1 in the ER, 1 in a car wreck, 1 shipped off to bootcamp early, 1 on the way out of town.

(that last one would be me,

conveniently scheduled to be out-of-state

the week that everyone’s shit is apparently due to hit the fan)

Totally awesome.

The cherry, really, on the top of this mune-day

is round two of intellectually-dwarfed customers

who believe in their core, with their gut, in the essence of their being

that nonfat milk has 0 calories.

I’m going to be honest here,

I had a moment

a crisis of doubt





and I broke down.

This is the second time in less than a month, after all.

I picked up a gallon of skim milk and I read the label

(not to the customer, I do have scruples, but just to myself

to be sure, without a doubt, that I was not crazy).

I’m not sure how this misguided notion that ‘nonfat’ = 0 calories

got into the ether and invaded the minds of seemingly normal adults

but in the event the contagion has spread, allow me to set the record straight:

Anyway. Yeah. So today was crappy.

And I have discovered that my stress tolerance is diminishing. Rapidly.

I’m experiencing physical discomfort, knots in my back, and difficulty breathing.

Basically, living the dream.

And so it was

that I decided I could not survive the day

in fact, I could not survive another hour

without macaroni and cheese.

Homemade, indulgent, dare I say hedonistic macaroni and cheese.

And though it may not look like much, rest assured this is the best

most delicious, most decadent, most dramatic

gluten free macaroni and cheese casserole that has ever graced the Earth.

And a little something funny while the noodles boil: