Yeah, so, today was crappy.
Woken up at dawn
from my best night of sleep in as long as I can remember
(despite the fact that I wasn’t into bed until after 2 am)
because the third-in at the shop was delayed indefinitely.
Long morning followed by an even longer “productivity session”
– payroll, scheduling, labor analysis, food analysis, store reports, weekly recaps, email, store orders… –
punctuated by a 24 hour resignation notice via text message.
(Which is a lot like being broken up with on a post-it.)
More scheduling, this time more like frantic shifting/tweaking/begging/pleading/texting/calling
plus a couple of tears, not because I’m sad so much as I’m just tired.
Tired of peoples’ shit.
It was one one of those days though
that went well beyond the realm of the human.
If it could go wrong, it did.
Both blenders broke.
Ran out of the most popular syrup.
Keyboard mysteriously missing two keys.
A store starting the day with 9 people –
now with 1 in the ER, 1 in a car wreck, 1 shipped off to bootcamp early, 1 on the way out of town.
(that last one would be me,
conveniently scheduled to be out-of-state
the week that everyone’s shit is apparently due to hit the fan)
The cherry, really, on the top of this mune-day
is round two of intellectually-dwarfed customers
who believe in their core, with their gut, in the essence of their being
that nonfat milk has 0 calories.
I’m going to be honest here,
I had a moment
a crisis of doubt
and I broke down.
This is the second time in less than a month, after all.
I picked up a gallon of skim milk and I read the label
(not to the customer, I do have scruples, but just to myself
to be sure, without a doubt, that I was not crazy).
I’m not sure how this misguided notion that ‘nonfat’ = 0 calories
got into the ether and invaded the minds of seemingly normal adults
but in the event the contagion has spread, allow me to set the record straight:
Anyway. Yeah. So today was crappy.
And I have discovered that my stress tolerance is diminishing. Rapidly.
I’m experiencing physical discomfort, knots in my back, and difficulty breathing.
Basically, living the dream.
And so it was
that I decided I could not survive the day
in fact, I could not survive another hour
without macaroni and cheese.
Homemade, indulgent, dare I say hedonistic macaroni and cheese.
And though it may not look like much, rest assured this is the best
most delicious, most decadent, most dramatic
gluten free macaroni and cheese casserole that has ever graced the Earth.
And a little something funny while the noodles boil: